This sign has recently appeared in the Gents at the place where I work.
Given that I’m amongst the youngest there, it’s a bit alarming that they feel that we need a refresher course in how to wash your hands, surely?
Category: Pictures Page 40 of 46
Yes, I appreciate that Dick Tracy used to have a wrist-radio-TV thing that enabled him to say “I’m on my way”, and I know that it looks like the sort of thing that we should have this side of the year 2000, but logic dictates that the screen is only ever – at best – going to be as big as your wrist.
The model shown above, which is available from Firebox, boasts a screen which measures a full 1.5″. Wow-ee. Now you too can see Citizen Kane reduced to the size of a matchbox. Will the wonders of modern science never cease?
As I noted in this post, trying to combine functions with a watch invariably results in something that’s too chunky to be a watch, but too small to work as a TV or calculator or whatever. And this seems to be one of those.
Granted, it might be bearable for watching Youtube videos or other short works of cinematic greatness like The Star Wars Kid , but watching a whole film on something so small? Only if you don’t mind risking eyestrain at the very least.
As ever, you may disagree wildly, and think that I’m talking pish. You’re absolutely entitled to that opinion, but do bear in mind that on this issue, David Lynch has made it clear that he and I are in complete agreement, though he uses stronger language to make his point.
As someone with a brain in my skull and more than a grain of love for humanity in my soul, I of course think that the Daily Mail is a morally repugnant, house-price-fixated, crypto-xenophobic waste of ink and trees. And if that sounds like an overreaction, do bear in mind it’s a matter of public record that they supported Oswald Mosely and his fascist group the Blackshirts in the run-up to World War II.
So, given this depth of feeling, I can only be delighted that someone’s gone to the trouble of creating the Daily Mail Headlineinator.
Simply add in a picture of something that the Mail might consider a threat to white middle-class suburban living (so, that would be anything at all), and the Headlineinator will condemn it for you. Immediately. Without regard for whether it’s actually to blame for anything at all. Just like the Daily Mail. As demonstrated above.
(Many thanks to Graeme for his permission to publish this link. He’s a gentleman, a scholar, and an acrobat.)
Looks as if a sexually frustrated tube worker has craftily inserted a subliminal message into a sign at Mile End tube station, asking for physical affection.
Not exactly John Donne, though, is it?
Spotted on Epping High Street earlier this week.
I think know what your first thought was on seeing this picture…
“£89.95? What a bargain! Those’ll be perfect for the Bay City Rollers convention at the Birmingham NEC next month!”
Either that, or, like me, you had one of those moments where you get a bit of vomit in your mouth.
Oh, Central Line tube card advert, why must you taunt me so? Your message aims to breeze through my eyes as a blast of air freshener would pass through my nostrils, but instead it chokes me as if it were the stench of a commuter’s sweaty armpit. I know you were told at school that missing out apostrophes was a bad thing, but that was an admonition about omission, not an order to sprinkle them without regard for their appropriateness. Tut tut!
Oh, Sainsbury’s section header, why must you taunt me so? My vision passes across your message, and stutters and starts as if I were trying to negotiate a revolving door wearing a pair of skis. I know you were told at school that E was a bad thing, but that was an admonition about pharmaceuticals, not the fifth letter of the alphabet. Tut tut!
Hire a suit from Moss Bros, and you too can peer down a lady’s top.
Moss Bros.
Making lechers better-dressed since 1851.
(Spotted in the London Victoria branch, and photographed covertly – which is why I didn’t spot the patch of glare until later. Ah well, c’est lavvy.)
The Wu-Tang clan have a new album out (pictured).
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not about to have a go at it – indeed, I’m quite an admirer of some of the members (Method Man’s duet with Texas at the 1998 Brit Awards was terrific), but…
… well, if you’re going to call your album ‘8 Diagrams’, is it not a bit daft to have the penultimate letter of that title (and indeed the Wu-Tang logo in the background) surrounded by the eight Trigrams of the I Ching?
I’m just, y’know, saying…
*A post about Wu-Tang Clan with a 50 Cent reference in the title, then. Truly, I am down with the kids. Maybe.