A still there from the latest TV ad by the not-Manchester-based soft drink, Oasis.
It’s quite an elaborate ad (backed by a suitably jargon-filled ‘integrated’ marketing campaign), built around the tagline ‘Oasis. For people who don’t like water’.
Would I be the first to point out that if you look at the label of a bottle of Oasis, the first listed (and therefore most prevalent) ingredient is water?
So, if you really don’t like water, this might not be the best drink for you to choose. Mind you, if you’re really anti-water to that extent, you probably don’t have time to buy soft drinks because you’re spending all day trying to avoid the 71% of the planet that is covered in water, or – and this is where the challenge sets in – the 65% of your body which is, on average, water.
I guess drinking Oasis because you don’t like water is probably like buying The Daily Star because you don’t like words.
The cover of yesterday’s Daily Mirror there, with a report on the proposal to impose a £6 levy to pay for a national standard of broadband access by way of charging landline owners 50p a month.
A proposal, the Mirror’s cover suggests, which has sparked FURY.
As you can see in the masthead box just above this news item, the Mirror costs 45p.
You can see where I’m heading with this, right?
As you know, I’m a huge fan of specious use of language or ill-considered turns of phrase, and so it’s a delight to come across another.
The British Music Experience is an exhibition about the history of (no surprise here) British music, and it’s located in the building formerly known as the Millennium Dome, in London.
I haven’t been, so I don’t know what it’s like, but the publicity for it (posters around London, and their website) contains the following quote:
“A comprehensive, conceptually flamboyant Wikipedia history of British pop music” – Observer Music Monthly
Well, either that’s what the use of the word ‘Wikipedia’ signifies, or maybe someone at the Observer needs to stop and think before dropping zeitgeisty words into sentences to make sure they actually mean something.
After all, that Twitter kind of attempt at unfounded hipness Crunk from a writer just looks Audioboo embarrassing.
This picture is currently being used to promote Miley Cyrus’s concerts in London this December.
However, I can’t help but think it looks more like a still from an episode of CSI.
Presumably Billy Ray Cyrus will manage to snag the role of grieving father, weeping over the perforated autopsy table.
After all, as well as appearing in the recent Hannah Montana film, he has demonstrated his range in other roles.
If you live in the London area and have somehow missed it, just a quick note to alert you to the impending London Underground strike.
Unless something happens in the next couple of hours to avert it, then the entire tube network is going to be pretty much dead from 6.59pm tonight for a period of 48 hours.
In theory, this should mean that tubes will be back up and running from 6.58pm on Thursday, but given how good London Underground are at meeting timetables at the best of times, I wouldn’t be expecting to see any trains rolling up to platform edges and opening the doors until Friday morning.
All pretty ho-hum really, but one line in the Transport for London press release on the strike amused me:
“Among other things, the RMT has also demanded … improved travel facilities”
Yes, RMT, I think a few million other people may have asked for better travel facilities in the London area over the years. Good luck with that request!
… although looking at the page count of Kanye West’s humbly-titled forthcoming book, it seems he’s only got half a book in him; he involved a co-writer.
For a book which totals 52 pages.
Is that even a book? More like a novella, surely. Then again, releasing it in a spiral-bound format will make it look a bit more substantial an item.
Coming in August, order now. It’s clearly the perfect Christmas gift!
For people you don’t really like that much, I mean.
Sorry if this frankly shocking, and very important, story ruins your Sunday afternoon, but this story really does need as much coverage as possible, so I felt almost compelled to share it.
Anyhow, brace yourself: this is the News.
>Sigh<
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