Dear BBC,

I gather that the character of Nick Cotton is due to return to EastEnders at Christmas.

Please could you arrange it so that he doesn’t appear at the end of the Christmas afternoon episode, say “‘Allo, Ma” before the doom-doom-doom drums, with the scene being continued in the evening episode?

If nothing else, it would be worryingly similar to the “Hello, Princess” return of Den Watts in 2003.

Lots of love,